Boston

Today's news of the Boston Marathon bombings have left me heartbroken today. As a mother, the thought of something this devastating happening to my children or to any member of my family has left me emotional today. I refused to read too much about it until the kids were in bed because it upsets Carson when I cry and I knew I wouldn't be able to hold back the tears. Days like today I am scared to raise my children in a world filled with so much evil. I'm not just scared - I'm terrified. How do you explain to a child what happened? 

In those moments, however, when I'm praying for the victims and their families, that I am reminded that we aren't in this alone. My children were saved for this time and they are strong. We are strong. We will make it. Together - we will make it. 

I was reminded of a quote from Elder Holland today:

“The FUTURE of this world has long been DECLARED; the final outcome between GOOD and evil is already KNOWN. There is absolutely no question as to who WINS because the VICTORY has already been posted on the SCOREBOARD. The only really strange thing is all of this is that we are still down here on the FIELD trying to decide which TEAM’S JERSEY we want to wear!"

When events like today happen, and Evil seems to have won, it's important to remember who will win the final battle. We will. 

This house is praying for Boston. 

My Beliefs

This post has been a long time in the making. I have started it and versions of it for over a year now and haven't ever actually posted it. After watching General Conference last weekend and thinking about this issue for quite some time, I decided I would finally express the feelings I have had. Note: I do not mean to offend anyone by my comments, but I am going to speak honestly and bluntly about things I have felt and do feel.

I have lots of friends and family not of my faith and I love them all dearly. Part of the reason I love them and appreciate them is because of our differences and I respect them for their beliefs. I know that their beliefs, although different than mine, are what make them who they are. That being said, I sometimes feel like that same love and tolerance for my religion is not returned. 

I want to be clear about something. Respecting someone for their beliefs and religion does not mean that you have to agree with said beliefs and religion. I, obviously, do not agree with everything that my friends/family believe. That is OK!  I still love them and support them in their beliefs and religion. I want them to be happy and find peace and worship God. I know that their beliefs and religion are a huge part - if not all- of who they are. To be someone's true friend and to truly love them, you have to love every part of them. If you can't accept that their religion and beliefs make up who they are, do you really love them? I try my hardest to make sure that I am always positive and uplifting about the people I care about and about their beliefs and religion. I support them in EVERYTHING they do. I have gone to many functions, fundraisers, worship services, etc. of other faiths when it is important to my friends and I have been invited to come. In fact, I feel like it is an honor and a privilege to be trusted with something so special and sacred to others. 

For some time now, I have felt like there are people who don't respect me or love me for the things that make me who I am - my religion and beliefs. Rude comments, jokes, and mocking comments are made with a smile so that they come off as "teasing" but they are still hurtful - extremely hurtful. Since I have never wanted to really argue, most of the time I brush the comments off and change the subject. However, they still bother me for a long time afterwards. I didn't ever realize how bad it had gotten until I took a step back and looked at my blog.

I write my blog for my family first and for my friends second. I have found myself not posting very much about my beliefs and my religion - even though I want to. I had to stop and really ask myself, "Why?" I want my kids to know my testimony and to never question the things I believe. Why, then, do I not post about it more? Why do I not share little insights that I learn and feelings that I have? Why do I not share messages that I find uplifting and talks that I love? I have realized that I don't do it because I don't want to offend those that believe differently than I do. I have become so burdened by the hurtful comments and rude remarks, that I have let it affect me personally and my willingness to share the Gospel with those around me.

All of that being said, I am going to start posting more about my beliefs and testimony on my blog. It is not meant to offend anyone, but it is important for me to share with my family and friends. I hope that those who care enough to read my blog also care enough about me to accept me for who I am and my religion/beliefs that make me the person/wife/mother/friend/sister that I am. I might not be perfect, but I am doing my best. I am learning and growing every day. I am trying harder to be better and come closer to my Heavenly Father and my Savior, and I want to record all of the experiences that get me one step closer.